#688 theoldmortuary ponders

Striking images make you think. Two striking images this weekend have provoked widespread pondering. Despite being musically aware throughout the career of Black Sabbath, their music has largely been an outlier for me.Breakfas today, with Black Sabbath was an easy way to reconnect. Although there is a lot to like, my somewhat flimsy reason for limited knowledge is that Heavy Metal gigs were uncomfortable places to be, with sweaty leather and testosterone laying heavy in the air. As contemporary ballet goes this one was somewhat patchy but with moments of unforgettable beauty. For the reasons above I can’t be knowledgeable about the music choices but my favourite snippet was included,so it gets a ✓from me. The audience was wild for the performance by the time the final curtain went down. Despite the fabulous image on the programme this scene did not exist in the performance we watched. We were rather disappointed, but not on the scale of disappointment that many people felt when there was no moment of joy when an actual Black Sabbath band member appeared out of the orchestra pit. Maybe that happens in Birmingham.

On a sartorial and olfactory note the atmosphere of the theatre was not filled with too much sweaty leather or testosterone.

©Banksy

Banksy, of course, made everyone think this week. Two hours of googling and research cannot make sense of a subject that makes no sense. But refreshing knowledge always shines a little more light. Madness for me, that the history homework where I first tried to understand the history of the Middle East would occasionally have had Black Sabbath as my background music of choice.

My dad would have shouted up the stairs ” How can you possibly understand what you are studying with that noise on”

My response now would be. ” Tell me what music makes any of this understandable”

#686 theoldmortuary ponders

What’s something you would attempt if you were guaranteed not to fail.

An interesting prompt from my blog hosts. One that is easy to answer as my definition of failure is a wonderfully flexible beast. I would buy a lottery ticket for the Euromillions. Knowing that winning any amount of money from the top life altering prize of many millions to the lowest £10 pay out is technically a success.

A £10 win would definitely be the easier of the prizes to receive. No moral conundrum with that amount of money. £10 would very nicely provide post bobbing chocolate for our swimming friends on Friday morning. Bigger sums would give more options and the biggest prize, whatever unthinkable amount of money it was, would give so much scope for thought, philanthropy and fun.

I am not someone that believes money guarantees happiness but it undoubtedly increases the chances of creating happiness and the power to make changes that allow happiness to be an option.

Money, wisely used makes the wheel of life run a little smoother.

#685 theoldmortuary ponders.

Battersea Power Station ©theoldmortuary

‘There are some losses that change the trajectory of your life’ P.Diddy

Puff Daddy, P.Diddy, Diddy or even  Sean Combs  his real name, is talking about the death of a woman he loved and shared three children with.

Significant losses or negative events do change the direction that life takes.

As an optimist and someone who likes to reflect on my half-full glass I am guilty of skimming over negative outcomes and always trying to find the best in people and situations.

Reflecting on the negative is not somewhere I feel comfortable but just acknowledging that negatives and positives have equal power to change the direction of life is somehow a quite relaxing thought. Just as the planned and unplanned have a similar capacity.

A ponder is not what I expected when I read an article about a Billionaire Rapper. Just one thoughtful sentence. Of course I have lived the reality of loss altering life’s directions. As has every human. But until today I could not have expressed that sensation so eloquently.

#684 theoldmortuary ponders

#682 tholdmortuary ponders.

Ponder #682 was a tragic historical blog about Slapton Sands but we had a fab time in the sun on the eponymously named Sunday. It was a vanlife day that started at 8am with breakfast.

There was also a Sunday newspaper to be read. Walks to be had and for Hugo some basking

Lola takes things a little further, or maybe less far, and lounges in a sunbeam.

For the humans days like this are about catching up and nattering. We have a friend who is going through a very raw grief currently. We have both been through that journey and seeing friends hitting such a life changing event is hard to witness with grim personal experiences to recall. But we are fine and imperfect examples of getting through both sudden, traumatic, grief and the slow destruction of terminal loss. It is good to talk of love and loss on a sunny day, on a beautiful beach with some dark history. Because we all need to know that the sun will come out again, even in dark places.

#681 theoldmortuary ponders

Here I am casting a long shadow. I pondered on the subject of this ponder. My ponder is not particularly upbeat Saturday but sometimes some ponders just need to get out. I’m sure all women who have worked in hospital environments would have experienced unwanted sexual attention from male colleagues or patients. Yesterday with my group of bobbers I saw a man I had last worked with more than 20 years ago. He was in our bobbing zone. At work we all needed to get along with him to make the working day go efficiently. He had an exterior persona of being chatty and pleasant but would throw in inappropriate comments in such a way that I questioned if I had heard correctly. There was also an element of having to engage in his, sometimes, flirty behaviour to get a job done.

One of the other bobbers had worked at the same place at the same time. She quickly got as far from him as possible. Rather than get changed near him I pulled my swimming stuff over my underwear. Checking that all the other bobbers were getting ready to swim with minimal flesh on show.

We all jumped in for a bob and I kept an eye on him. He was staying a long time in the changing zone, chatting and being charming I am sure. I decided that when the time came to get out I would tell all the bobbers to move their stuff to a different place to get changed.

I am certain he would have done nothing beyond watching and chatting but that is not really the point. For twenty years in the eighties and nineties many women at that place of work knew to be cautious around him. Did anyone ever share their experiences with their line managers. I think it is extremely unlikely. Could he get away with such behaviour in the twenty-twenties. Probably. How many women could tell a similar story, even now.

This is not headline grabbing stuff but it is low level intimidation and it casts a long shadow.

#672 theoldmortuary ponders.

What aspects of your cultural heritage are you most proud of or interested in?

Being British is to be curated from a culture that has always been a multicultural stew. As befits a small island nation that has been the subject of invasions and conquests. We also have a history as colonisers which has many negative connotations but has boosted the multicultural character of Britain. It is multicultural Britain that I am most proud of, it is my cultural heritage. Maybe I should do a genetic test to see what heritage my genes are sourced from. That question is easily answered. But where do my cultural interests come from. I honestly have no idea. I am a magpie for the cultural experiences that living in an ethnically diverse community brings. I used the word magpie advisedly; just like a magpie I see/ hear/ taste/ experience something intriguing from other cultures or heritages and immediately research/ steal the idea from any source to pop into my mental resource to be utilised later when and if appropriate. No shame.

#683 theoldmortuary ponders.

Pondering and Blogging are curious ways to start the day. Initially I rejected the prompt below because I felt I had nothing to say on the subject.

Share a lesson you wish you had learned earlier in life.

Whilst not exactly a lesson, today’s observation is something I constantly need to cherish. All of my life my limbic system has been a great ally in my judgement of people, places and situations. Below is the complex explanation.

What Is The Limbic System? Definition, Parts, And Functions

Put in my simple terms I should listen better to my instinctive responses. Ignore them at my own peril. If I listened better, life may have been easier in places and I may even have been in different places.

This ponder is about location. When I first moved to the West Country 35 years ago, I immediately sought out the Water-colour painting community. The group I joined had regular demonstrations in a local Quaker Meeting House. After the session people drove off to a rough and ready pub in a dockyard area. I was immediately bewitched. There was often live music and the notes and lyrics bounced off the docks and harbours nearby. In my vivid imagination the wooden ghost ships of the past jostled for space on the already redundant wharves and salty old sailors were listening to the same tunes as a bunch of amateur artists. I immediately felt a sense of belonging.

Two years ago I moved within easy walking distance of that same pub. Both of us have changed, almost unrecognisably in the 35 years. I still imagine wooden ships and salty old seafarers in this location but am surrounded by tech startups and call centres housed in beautiful historic buildings.

Last night I was lucky enough to be able to visit a replica wooden galleon. El Galleon Andalucia. So my imagination has a little more heft. The photos are from my visit. The one below is just a coil of rope but exactly illustrates how life circles around and takes us all, to sometimes unplanned, destinations via interesting routes.

#677 theoldmortuary ponders

Another day of prepping for an art exhibition. This time at a local National Trust property. You might think that having prepped recently for an Open Studio event I would be pretty well organised. But every exhibition has different criteria, different commission and often different hanging requirements. Of course this wouldn’t be an arty blog without some procrastination. Today productivity was my procrastinator of choice. Before I could allow myself to get the art organised I felt it to be essential to get all the home chores done. Dipping into my stored works is another form of procrastination, some of them will never see the glitz and glamour of a gallery. I’m not sure my Pangolin painting will ever be one that I can sell, but every time I go through my paintings file, his sleepy eye catches my attention. I’ve always loved Pangolins and painted this sleepy fellow when scientists were trying to find an animal who might have passed Covid-,19 on to humans.

Blogging was the subject of an extraordinarily dull repetitive dream last night. No matter how often I woke myself up I kept slipping back into it. It was such a boring subject, I could never have written such a thing. Better to miss a day than inflict complete tedium onto the blogosphere. On a positive I find myself with all exhibition admin done and all the domestic admin completed half way through the day. That feels like procrastination is a good thing.

#672 theoldmortuary ponders

Are you holding a grudge? About?

Sometimes one of these Jetpack prompts really is a pause for thought.

Do I hold a grudge?

No. I do, however, have a mental filing system of harms done, both great and pathetic.

I use this filing system to learn by experience.

Anybody, myself especially can cause harm to another inadvertently or unintentionally. If I am made aware I certainly try to not repeat my bad behaviour.

But the sad fact is that there are many people in the world who set out to cause harm to others. These people are best avoided. This is not bearing a grudge but just a sensible precaution.

If I held grudges, specifically compared to my mental filing system, I think I am creative enough to consider revenge as an art form worthy of quite a lot of thought and planning. I suspect my revenge would be malignant,served cold but with deadly accuracy. The drawer just slamming shut is so much easier for me to live with.

The mental filing system permits a much more subtle and less harmful act to all. If someone has more than one harmful item in their drawer of my mental filing system then there is a risk that their drawer may be closed forever. Minor characters with no redeeming features have their drawer shut and locked with relative ease. People who are more important, or are of greater interest to me certainly can keep their drawer open longer, maybe forever, even though, of course, their harms can often cut deeper.Best not depend on that though, nothing in the filing system is guaranteed. I hold the only master key.

rhdr

So Grudges- no thank you

A nice tidy filing system of harms, or learning events. Yes please.

#673 theoldmortuary ponders.

What’s your favorite time of day?

Curiously my favourite time of day is around 2am. A time that I usually sleep through, but years of  the madness of 24 hour shifts gave me a huge respect for that hour of quietude when, with luck, the previous days work has been caught up with and the dip of 3am is yet to happen.

Now the only thing that gets my attention at 2 am is a dog or dogs who need to visit the back yard. Even my occasional insomnia never kicks in until 3 am. So favourite time of day, I love you but I really don’t need to be awake to appreciate your merit.