The blog I should have written yesterday.  I have been an urban bad person, driving 24mph in a 20mph zone. Unknowingly until a brown letter dropped through my door. £100 fine and either mandatory attendance at a Speed Awareness Course or 2 points on my licence.

I accepted the course either on-line or in person. On-line bookings were not being accepted so I opted to attend a city hotel 5 miles away. The booking that appeared when I clicked Plymouth, was a remote golf club in Launceston, a small Cornish town more than an hour away.

And then the chicken story of yesterday got in the way. The ear worm of The Janner Song became my in car entertainment as I drove through miles of  beautiful Cornish Countryside in glorious sunshine.

West Country accents shift and change as the geography of Devon and Cornwall change.

As I sat in the front of the classroom I could easily pick up the distinctive Plymouth accent from quite a few course attenders who, like me had been relocated ” down Cornwall”

Every time a “Proper Job” Plymothian spoke my head played a few seconds of the Janner Song.

Well, in England’s South West is the

county that’s best,
       
full of rolling green hills and a coast
           
that’s been blessed.
     
And inside of the Sound lie the three
        
Plymouth towns,
     
where everyone’s known as a Janner.



Janners,   Janners,
               
down in Plymouth we’re all known as

Janners.


        
And our own footballteam Plymouth Argyle
 
supreme
             
are the finest this beautiful county has

seen.
     
Every player of every nationality,
                        
when they pull the green they’re all

Janners.



Janners,   Janners,
               
down in Plymouth we’re all known as

Janners.


So, there was our song, we didn’t keep you
    
too long,
              
now you all know just one word of

West-Country slang.
                         
And while there’s meat on me bones, I hope
     
I’ll always be known
    
as a typical Plymouth grown Janner.


Janners,    Janners,
              
down in Plymouth we’re all known as

Janners.


Janners,    Janners,
                
down in Plymouth we’re all known as

Janners.

The Janner Song by the Sensational Baret Brothers.

I blame the chickens.

There was an irony to attending a speed awareness course in deepest Cornwall when, for many of us, our misdeeds took place within Jannerland City Limits.

These were two of the roads I drove down to get home.

Not a chance of reoffending.

It has been a sunglasses all day kind of day. Thank goodness it is April 2nd, no chance that I am writing an April Fool prank.

Sunglasses for certain but also a jumper. The jumper was essential. Both in bright sunlight and the deep shadows it has been very chilly.

Ancient statuary and accidental comedy, who knew they could be blogging partners.

We went on an Easter Egg hunt at a favourite National Trust Property. The formal gardens are often the location of themed events for children.

Our granddaughter has a cover-all word for all types of genitals . Mooeee

No matter what we are doing in the gardens she is always amused that Mercury managed to remember his hat but not his trousers. The sculpture is a copy of one in the Uffizzi, Florence.

My accidental trip to a Comedy Club last night featured a twenty minute monologue on the discomfort of a blind man attending an ultrasound examination on his Mooeee.

It was pretty funny for the whole audience, more so for me because I used to do ultrasound examinations on all sorts of Mooeees.  There were points when I laughed too hard, but how freeing to laugh about the absurdities of mooeee scanning without having to behave professionally. And to laugh in a room full of people laughing about the same absurdities was just lovely.

The comedian described the probe used as a small hand held device. It is actually called a small parts probe. Not something any gentleman was ever pleased to hear in a clinic!

What a great coincidence to see Mercury without his pants one day and then experience comedy about his exposed parts the next day.

A classic illustration of Mooeee for the blog.

P.s Mercury also seems to be looking at a microphone. Perhaps he was considering comedy as a career.