Tag: dailyprompt

#1349 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Serendipity, Stonehouse1 Comment
8 a.m

What’s your definition of romantic?

My mother, who was in most ways a very pragmatic person, had a guilty secret. She loved a romantic novel.

I have inherited her pragmatism but not her taste in books. Romance books are not my thing unless the romance is just one facet of an engaging narrative. Romancing, romantic gestures etc, just feel a little icky and coersive in specifically romantic novels. There is nearly always a power imbalance or jeopardy involved in the interactions between the people involved, there would be no story without such things.

However, as a woman whose glass is habitually half-full there must be a huge dose of my mothers love of romance residing in my soul, because life is sometimes shitty and yet I always try to find something positive in whatever situation.

Noon

The tidal pool was my destination for the morning dog walk and later I swam from the beach beside it.

For both visits it was rather a seaweedy experience.

8 a.m and noon.

But my glass-half-full, romantic head will only ever remember a beautiful morning walk and a delicious lunchtime swim, not the weed that made the pool unusable and stuck on my skin. Romance is seeing beyond irritation, embracing the moment and finding the golden nuggets in every experience. However mad that seems.

Not paying too much attention to the seaweed of life.

Reality of a good day.
Romance of a good day.

Harold S Kushner* emphasized the importance of finding good in every situation, stating, “If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul,”.

*

Soul nurturing, that is pretty romantic in my opinion.

#1343 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Serendipity1 Comment

Are there things you try to practice daily to live a more sustainable lifestyle?

I try wherever possible to buy second-hand things. Clothes, books and items for our home in particular. More so in the last 20 years, to a lesser extent for the last 50. I also buy canvasses for my large paintings from charity shops. The large box canvasses that retailers sell in their thousands for people to adorn their walls with instant pre-curated art which are then abandoned for the next easy home switcharound.

I have been doing it long enough to be confident in my purchases. I would say that my success rate is slightly higher than it was when I used to buy more new items.

The world has caught up with me and passed me by. Second-hand, thrift, vintage, pre-loved are the current trending trends. There are a huge variety of new ways of doing what I have been doing for decades and yet I stick to the methods that work for me.

1.Charity Shops. Giving wisely and receiving all in one transaction.

2. Ebay- used with caution and learned wisdom.

3. Gifts or swaps with friends. One woman’s error is another woman’s gem.

Fast Fashion teases and traps me on occasion, and I feel no shame because however fast it is at inception I know that the garment will be with me for the long haul and will be styled with something from the last century. On a woman from the last century who sometimes puts pockets in things that didn’t start life with pockets.

Today I commented that two of my friends looked fabulous. Both whispered the word ‘Primark’ and then the word ‘Pockets’.

Will I be able to keep away..

I will try.

Are there things you try to practice daily to live a more sustainable lifestyle?

Sometimes I can be very trying.

#1340 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Words2 Comments
* see below

How important is spirituality in your life?

I would say spirituality is one of the great intangibles. It presents in so many ways. I have no idea where I sit on the spirituality spectrum. Nowhere near the elite end, but probably more spiritual than a broad bean.

Proof of how intangible spirituality is I looked up the broad bean only to discover that it is quite the Spiritual Legume.

Broad beans, also known as fava beans, have a complex symbolic history, particularly in relation to death and the afterlife. While not universally considered spiritual, they have been associated with funerary rituals and the belief that they contain the souls of the deceased in some cultures. However, other traditions view them as symbols of resurrection, good luck, or even royalty. 

Here’s a more detailed look:

Symbolism related to death and the underworld:

  • Ancient Greeks and Romans:Believed broad beans were linked to the underworld due to their long roots and the black spots on their flowers, which were seen as a connection between the world of the living and the dead. 
  • Funerary rituals:Broad beans were sometimes spread over tombs to provide peace to the deceased. 
  • Fave dei morti:In some traditions, like those in Italy, small cakes shaped like broad beans (but not actually made of them) are eaten on All Souls’ Day, symbolizing “beans of the dead”. 
  • Soul wind:Some believed that eating broad beans released the soul wind through the body. 

Symbolism related to resurrection and reincarnation:

  • Growth:The bean’s upward growth from the earth can be seen as a symbol of resurrection and spiritual awakening.
  • Rebirth:Some traditions view beans as symbols of reincarnation, where the seed contains a dormant soul waiting to be reborn. 

Other symbolic meanings:

  • Good luck:In some traditions, like 17th and 18th century Britain, broad beans were associated with good luck, sometimes found in cakes like the Twelfth Night cake. 
  • Royalty:In traditions like the Portuguese king cake, a bean inside the cake signifies the person who gets to provide the next cake. 
  • Magic:Broad beans are also mentioned in folklore as having magical properties, such as warding off ghosts or even being connected to witches. 
*See below

Research is a fabulous thing. I have just learned that Fava beans are Broad Beans. I had no idea, but I also discovered that spirituality-wise I am exactly a  broad bean.

  • Broad beans are not considered universally spiritual.
  • Sometimes I suffer from ‘Soul Wind’
  • Will I ever be able to say the Lord’s Prayer without thinking? ” Our Fava”.

I have been enlightened.

*See below

*The Buddha with the fractured skull lives in our yard and has lived in my last three gardens.

She was a regular,uninjured, deity until a freak mini tornado in South London picked her up and tossed her against a garage wall. Her left Temporal bone was caved in. An earthly rather than spiritual injury.

Instantly she was turned from a peaceful piece of garden adornment into a unique planter. Her scars and missing bits of skull are covered by plants as she lays serenely in our yard.

#1317 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn SerendipityLeave a comment

What’s the one luxury you can’t live without?

Time.

I would like to squeeze a little more out of every day.  The candle is burned at either end, and most days have a little more content than capacity.

Life swirls and dips like murmurating starlings at dawn and dusk. But my murmurations are not confined to either end of the day. Any unfilled gap in a day can be easily filled with some mental, domestic or creative murmuration.

Murmurating is not always the most economic use of time. For the economy of time there are lists and routines. Dull but essential.

The missed meeting.

I’ve had a busy extended week and in an attempt to squeeze more out of a day I started on some routine tasks at 11:30 pm. I worked through my lists and hopped off to bed. Smug that I had achieved.

A quick note to a friend to plan a meeting ‘ tomorrow’ was my last point on the to-do list. But I had failed to realise that when I wrote it tomorrow had already become today and thus my meeting ended up as a coffee and a hot chocolate for 1!

I spent an hour happily waiting, murmurating creatively.

All sorts of odd jobs were done on my phone. But the planned meeting did not take place and has been bounced into an as yet unspecified gap in both our schedules.

Would the luxury of more time helped? Maybe not.

I fear I will always fill all of my moments rather too full for comfort. Until I don’t.

*

Clock with Murmurating Starlings.

#1310 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Serendipity1 Comment
Quiet Corner at Cotehele

How do you know when it’s time to unplug? What do you do to make it happen?

Interesting that this prompt uses an electrical metaphor for a state of mind. In the 14th or 15th century, when this set of buildings was built the humans who lived and worked here would also have needed to unplug from their busy lives. They would have used a different metaphor.

An over-busy head is not a 21st Century phenomenon.

I originally skimmed past this blog prompt as being a bit superficial, but I recently took a quiet 10 minute refuge in this spot on the Cotehele estate in Cornwall. It is not even a very quiet spot. But at the time it was just the place to have a reset. Absolutely a minor one but how lovely to do this in a place that almost invites you to sit down and take a few minutes,and that has done so for 500 years, and barring an apocalypse will probably do so for another 500 years.

To answer the question. I know that I need to unplug many times a day. My pondering head and my real-life head are always far too busy. Just like a cranky or highly sophisticated electrical device, I just need to switch off, unplug and reset, luckily I can usually disconnect anywhere. Sometimes it is automatic and sometimes deliberate. Cold water swimming  is a good trick, but that takes a little planning. But seeking out a quiet corner also always works.

Quiet corners can be found anywhere, I just have to find them. Sometimes they are in the nooks and crannies of my own imagination

#1309 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Serendipity1 Comment
A VW at Epidavros

Do you remember life before the internet?

I do remember life before the internet. If I were to live to age 80 my life would be roughly 50/50 pre and post domestic internet use. Because the change is within my adult lived experience I feel comfortable with and understand the differences. Information and services as a commodity are delivered to me without having to leave my bed. In the pre internet era I would have needed to move a bit to turn on a radio or television. Before that I would have needed, at the very least to go to the door and pick up a newspaper that had been delivered to my door.

I have always been a nerdy person with an unquenchable thirst for knowledge and information, not in a focused kind of way. Random knowledge of no particular use is one of my specialist subjects.

I used to spend a lot of time in Reference Libraries, looking things up and following trails of information that may or may not have been of any practical use to me. Not something I could do every day. I was an early ‘ Rabbit Holer’ before rabbit holing became a thing. I don’t recall the last time I went into a reference library outside of University studies.

For most things I believe I could easily manage back in an analogue world, but quenching a random need to know more about something, quickly, would be something I would really miss. Back to the Reference Library for me, but maybe I am so hooked on rabbit holes now I would be in there every day.

A VW at Epidavros for no particular reason.

#1305 theoldmortuary ponders.

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Plymouth, Serendipity1 Comment
Morning in Devonport Park

What quality do you value most in a friend?

Friends are like flowers in a late Spring flowerbed. They are all unique and are perfect in their own ways and in their own time. Some are fleeting and others are perennial. I would find it hard to pick out a single quality that they have in common, but as an ensemble they are a fabulous bunch. Friendships, like these flowers all change over time but as long as we can all still get along does that even matter?

Evening in Devonport Park

#1301 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Serendipity1 Comment

What does “having it all” mean to you? Is it attainable?

I was a working mother in the 80′,90’s and the noughties. I was also doing on-call, studying and caring at a distance for ailing parents.  If the traditional media of the time was to be believed I was actually,  ” having it all”.

Obviously it was attainable but only with the support of a husband, two wonderful child-minders. Brenda and Bev, and the most fabulous children.

A Glass ceiling.

” Having it all” was exhausting and, at the time, essential. It is what women had/have to do just to get to the glass ceiling, never mind crack the effing thing.

A cracked glass ceiling.

Life was all about spinning plates, lists and always having a plan B.

” Having it all” was actually just a phase and an informal training scheme for extreme multitasking. A hugely valuable skill that I treasure, but do I ever need to ” Have it all” again.

No Thank You

Not, ” having it all” is far better than ” having it all” but I would not have missed ” having it all” however hard it was at the time.

#1300 theoldmortuary ponders. Part 2

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, Serendipity3 Comments
Fishing in Tranquility Bay

Who would you like to talk to soon?

Part 2 the blog I would have written if I hadn’t written Part 1.

#1299 theoldmortuary ponders. Part 1.

It would be great to have a natter with my Dad. But as he has been in another realm for 30 years, I would have to say that if I can postpone that natter for as long as possible, I would be very grateful . Especially as we would then be in a position of having an eternity of nattering, perhaps.

I have been having a bit of survivor guilt recently,having outlived both my parents by 4 years. I am probably unrecognisable from the 36 year old they left behind so that would be quite the big subject. I feel guilty because they were never able to be the grandparents they could have been due to ill health and caring responsibilities.. I am lucky enough to be a Nana to 3 delightful granddaughters.It is such a life enhancing role. I am sad that both my parents and children missed out on knowing each other well. My own grandparents born in 1888 and 1898, part of the ‘lost’ generation who had survived two world wars, were never as thrilled to be with me as I am with my small people. As long as I was quiet and with my head in a book they were content to let me be. My other female grandparent was born in the First World War and was a busy businesswoman by the time she was my grandparent. She dropped into my life as an infrequent but glamorous visitor exuding American-style glamour and smelling of perfume, cigarettes and gin and tonic evenings. A heady mix in rural Essex. Also hardly the sort of grandparent required in the 2020’s.. I don’t think bonding  and building a relationship with me was a priority  for them.

But their children, my parents, would have been fabulous grandparents if they had had the chance.

So like much of my adult life I have to make ‘grandparenting’ up as I go along. I must say I find it all rather lovely, hence the survivors guilt and the desire for that conversation, but not any time soon.

Fishing in Tranquility Bay