Write about your most epic baking or cooking fail.

My epic fail occurred one Christmas when I was batch cooking sausage rolls. Enough to feed a substantial quantity of festive guests. I had a large range style cooker and every shelf was filled with unctuous sausage meat enrobed with the best flaky pastry that supermarkets could sell. 30 mins cooking time was the perfect timing to pop to a neighbour for a tiny Seasonal drink. Unfortunately, the neighbours didn’t do tiny and I didn’t do portion control or observe my 30-minute time slot. An hour passed in a twinkling and I was full of festive spirit ( gin). Once home I was in no rush to rescue my baked goods.  They were already past anyone’s judgment of edible. When the oven cooled down I swept them into a carrier bag to feed the birds in a local park after Christmas Day. Off to the park I went with a gaggle of over sugared children. I handed over the bag of sausage rolls and paid little attention to  the bird feeding, just taking some mental breathing space. Somewhat irresponsibly I had weaponised children and was not paying attention. Each tiny bite-sized sausage roll was a rock in the hands of small children. Birds scattered, fearful of their feathered lives. Other parents and park visitors judged me as I realised that for the second time in 48 hours I had failed to adequately assess the sausage roll situation.

Nobody remembers that I did clear up the mess, no birds were actually harmed and that everyone had a fabulous hour or so in the park.

Every Christmas when a sausage roll passes the lips of any child or adult who has knowledge of that day. Somebody pipes up with the legend of me killing birds in a local park at Christmas time with over cooked sausage rolls because I had drunk too much gin.

All other years my sausage rolls have been fabulous. Nobody ever mentions that.

What are your favorite types of foods?

My poor sense of taste and smell, post-COVID, means that my lifetime favourite foods have changed. Seasoning, unusual flavour pairings, and texture are the things that bring mealtime pleasure on the days when I cant really taste very much and the food world resembles soggy cardboard. This question was timely today as I popped into Marks and Spencer to buy a new madcap product.

Who knows what gustatory delight Caramel Sauce with Marmite will bring? The Original Salt and Pepper Seasoning would certainly have been beneficial to the chips in the top picture. They were the epitome of cardboard

Interview someone — a friend, another blogger, your mother, the mailman — and write a post based on their responses.

Good Morning Basking Shark, of all the creatures I might have imagined eating breakfast with you were not on my list. As the second largest shark in the world I was completely unaware that my chosen breakfast spot, Trevone Bay was also yours. 

For me a bacon bap.

For you the attraction is Shrimp, Lavae, Zooplancton, Copepods and fish eggs.

For two hours we watched as you basked in the bay. We watched as families belly-boarded, oblivious to you just 100 yards from  their happy squeals.

What a privilege. The shark however was unavailable for comment. Not wishing to speak with his mouth full.

What’s your favorite recipe?

Not exactly my favourite recipe but definitely the favourite of the week.

Our weekend newspaper has a pull out cooking segment. Most weeks we find something new to cook.

Koftas are a favourite meal and this recipe was so simple and pretty to make, it will definitely become a regular.

The most favourite of these weekend magazine dishes is a chicken and Chorizo dish which also features oranges. We have been making it for years. We no longer refer to the tatty scrap of torn out page that first inspired us. Who even knows if we are adhering to the actual recipe. Do we care?

Not a bit, it whatever form it takes, is a classic family meal.

That is my answer for today but as yet I have not read the recipes in this weeks  ‘Feast’. There could be a whole new favourite on the blog tomorrow.

List 10 things you know to be absolutely certain.

1. Certainty is, in many ways a good thing.

2. Certainty slightly frightens me as a certainty.

3.I am a lover of serendipity and certainty is the enemy of serendipity.

4. I know that certainty is desirable, in many respects, for a   dull,smooth, uninteresting and predictable life. We all need a bit of this.

5. Certainty is also the enemy of creativity for me.

6.Certainty is the opposite of happenstance. I love happenstance.

7. How dissappointing is a certainty that fails to thrive?

8 Remember how joyful it is to clutch success from certain failure.

9.Adaptable is a great resource when certainty fails.

10. Death is the only true certainty and that is to be avoided for as long as possible.

If you could host a dinner and anyone you invite was sure to come, who would you invite?

We have been hosting meals for the last 19 days, everyone always  attended. Two different groups of  relatives. 7 in each group. It would have been lovely if we had a home big enough to host them all at once and that their schedules permitted that. 5 of the 14 live locally the other 9 travelled from London, Hong Kong and Canada.

I realise this prompt wants me to  mix an erudite or entertaining group of famous people. But really how awkward and uncomfortable might that be. Far better to go for people I actually know and whose qualities I value. I have chosen my family in this first instance but equally I could throw 14 friends together around a dinner table and be confident of a good time. In either case their names would mean nothing in this  context and that is exactly what would make the experience enjoyable.