Category: Family

#326 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family1 Comment

And just like that, August is over. We saw August out immersed in Canadian family. Having spent our entire North American experience taking daily swims in lakes, today we had a pool day. It would have been a tremendous shock if this had happened at the beginning of our holiday because we have become very used to swimming in the salty water of the sea over the last couple of years. But 8 days of fresh water lake swimming has made us used to not being able to float so easily.

Swimming in a pool is a fabulous place to ponder, I was as immersed in water as we have been in family for the past 5 days.We are very lucky. The cast of individuals has changed every day but there has been chatter, reminiscing and food ever since we arrived on Saturday evening. It will continue until we leave. Just being with people who are kind and generous of their time and homes is so very good for the soul. Soon enough we will be standing on our own two feet again nurturing our own family on the other side of the Atlantic.

Covid robbed us of so much family time on both sides of the Atlantic, and further afield. This summer we have had some wonderful moments, lets hope we never have such big gaps between visits ever again

#323 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, Food ( but this is not a food blog)Leave a comment

Here we are in Ontario trying to find our place as numbers 14 and 15 in a family we have not seen for over 3 years because of Covid restrictions/ lack of passports and annual leave constraints. Just like marbles in a jar  there has to be a little movement in all directions for us to settle. The walking of many miles on our previous of four days was just a training exercise. Now we are all about the food. You know you have landed in the heart of an Anglo-Indian family when the welcoming meal is a belly bursting curry. Nothing like a curry that is painstakingly recreated from a recipe book or created by a restaurant chef,  but one that has evolved over many years at the hands of an Aunt who knows her recipes inside out and creates intuitively and with love.

#275 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Art for sale, Covid +, Family, SerendipityLeave a comment

And just like that, life returns to normal. Maybe in the three months leading up to July I would have thought that there would be a bit of a pinch point, late in July, when I would have a full commitment to family plans and a full commitment to running an exhibition, that had been in the pipe line for a long while. What I had not factored in was catching Covid. Two and a half years of avoiding the dreaded virus had given me a false sense of security. Exactly at my identified, life plan, pinch point, Mr Covid came calling, taking out three family members on the same day and one family member a week earlier. The two episodes cannot have been linked. But they reshaped our summer plans and added to the pinch point.

A Venn Diagram of my life.

The trouble with pinch points in life is that they look more dramatic when they are just abstract plans. Sometimes they look like a near impossible juggle. Juggling two balls certainly seems doable but throwing in the third ball seems foolhardy. As it happened life just flowed past the hurdle of Covid, our family replanned its plans. The Print Exhibition went beautifully to plan.

And here we are on the other side, bobbing in the sea and wondering what all the overthinking was about.

©Andy Bobber

#269 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, SerendipityLeave a comment

Yesterday was a fine observation of how Covid has altered life. @theoldmortuary used to row gigs out of Cawsand, this coastal village  Until yesterday we had not been there for nearly three years but in the past we knew these waters very well. For the first time ever we arrived by ferry.

The plan was to spend about three hours on the beach doing the things that 3 year olds love. In reality so much more was achieved as Kayaks could be rented, and fabulous milk shakes ordered.

And the sea was warm enough for everyone to swim as much as they wanted. We are nearly at the end of our week of intense family time. It has been such a blast of fun and exploration but also a big lesson in how beautiful our surroundings are and how accessible everything is. Looking at life through the eyes of a child really is an education and a wake up call to enjoy the moment. After a day at the beach we went on a camping adventure. High up on a Devon hillside we looked west towards Cornwall and in particular at Cawsand where we had spent the day.

Camping for a three year old is very exciting and almost derailed the beach outing because of the levels of excitement the appearance of a small person  sleeping bag created. Lessons to be learned, do not reveal the trump card of the day until all other activities have been exhausted. We even practiced camping in a supermarket car park while provisions were purchased.

Driving skills were practiced.

But the ultimate goal was always the sleeping bag.

Not necessarily sleeping though!

#268 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, SerendipityLeave a comment

Circles of Life.The patterns of a poppy, jelly fish and chandelier are very similar looking images of this weeks blogs. Life doing circles is sometimes more obvious than others. Curiously in the week when my two grown up children have returned, temporarily, to the nest. I have witnessed real birds sitting in nests. Something I have never, knowingly, been close to before.

These three little birds were perched in a nest near a footpath down to the beach at Tregantle. Desperately squeaking for a supper of fresh worm.

Having braved the hurley burley of Padstow on a busy sunny day we managed to escape the crowds by finding a first floor restaurant.

We were not the only ones to have a birds eye view of the crowds while sitting in a calm contemplative space. A pigeon had found herself a snug spot just a few steps from fine dining and a well stocked bar. The chandelier in the top picture would give her light too when daylight faded.

All too soon, of course, these nests, as will mine, will be empty again. The circle of life bringing tristesse after joy as certainly as night follows day. Possibly a glum way to end a blog without reminding ourselves that it is a circle of life and that joy , perhaps yet unimagined, will also follow hard on the heels of tristesse.

#267 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn FamilyLeave a comment

You almost never know when is the last time you will do something. Visiting Whitsand Bay in South East Cornwall is a case in point for us. A spectacular 8 km sandy beach about half an hour from home. To visit takes a fairly determined beach goer as access is down a steep path but the rewards certainly outweigh the 10 minute descent. I suspect life got in the way of our family visits. There was a period of life when I had two children under 7 and two terminally ill parents who lived 300 miles away.

Quite why I allowed life to stop us visiting I don’t know. Life pressures and commitments have a way of limiting freedom and choice, almost imperceptibly but, brutally. So 30 years have passed and the small children who last struggled down the hill with me have children of their own.

This is not the sort of place to ignore for 30 years and a beach this beautiful that allows dogs year round should have been back on my radar as soon as we got Hugo 10 years ago.

Better late than never, life is too short to let a place like this slip through my fingers again.

#266 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn FamilyLeave a comment

Building family memories at the Lost Gardens of Heligan did not disappoint.

Advert in Devonport

Even getting there lived up to the name. Despite visiting many times we talked so much we missed the turning and ended up in Mevagissy. No bad place to end up but not the destination of our actual day.  A family reunited after the Covid years is an overwhelming experience but Heligan gave us the time and place to wander and talk and reconnect in groups of one or two or even as one big pack. Under the watchful gaze of non human, plant sculptures.

Or even a traditional scarecrow keeping birds off flowers and observing us under his watchful button eye gaze.

https://www.heligan.com

Brave things were done by me, a person whose life -long anticipatory vertigo is something to be lived with but not life limiting. Feel the fear and do it anyway.

Just doing really normal things with people that you love is just so pleasurable after two years isolated from one another. One lesson I have learned is just to keep pushing forward. Not always on a rope bridge, for sure,but looking forward rather than back is a strategy that works for all aspects of life as well as rope bridges.

#265 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, SerendipityLeave a comment

The sun setting on the first of our family days . More than 15,000 steps walked by 5 adults, 2 dogs and one small person. Fabulous to have a day out that just used a quick ferry ride. When we lived in Cornwall, Mount Edgecumbe was a 30 minute car journey. I used to marvel at the families from Plymouth that just casually caught the ferry over for a picnic. Yesterday we did exactly that. Packed up food in our rucksacks and set off on the Cremyll ferry from Admirals Hard to Mount Edgecumbe.

A ferry has crossed this stretch of the Hamoaze since 1204, or 7:15 in the morning depending on your time frame.

In true picnic style ours was eaten fairly soon after arrival and desert was an ice cream from the fabulous Orangery.

15,000 steps was a lot for everyone in the gorgeous weather of yesterday. On our return we all eased our bones and feet with a swim in the sea and our minds with bedtime stories and boardgames.

A day in mid July that felt a lot like Christmas in so many ways.

#264 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, SerendipityLeave a comment

Rather an appropriate quotation for a day with a late blog. A busy day in beautiful weather but very much a day for making the most of the moment and having our family around us.

©Jenny Tsang

Plymouth was beautiful but we turned our back on Plymouth and headed to Cornwall on the ferry. Not exactly the gateway to Cornwall but certainly an interesting portal to a different world.

Castles and canons were the perfect props for a small girl obsessed by Pirates.

Then a cruise past our usual dog walks.

And then time to set foot back in Plymouth.

#244 theoldmortuary ponders

On By theoldmortuary.designIn Family, Stonehouse1 Comment

Sunshine and showers was the weather serving for this weekend. Not exactly bittersweet but certainly two sides of the same coin.

Much like Fathers Day, which was for many, the focus point of the weekend. As an outside observer to many traditional family gatherings I wonder if living through a pandemic has sharpened the focus on marking significant days with family and friends. There seems to be less marketing of these events and more gathering together, less gifts more visits. We had a lovely family visit, despite not being able to offer the inducements of any fathers or grandfathers. Just a father on the horizon and an actual one,for one of our number, across the river in Cornwall. Enough to make the weekend have a little buzz of purpose. Three of us, unable to visit father’s in the other realm or in another country had an unhurried afternoon of wandering around the shops with no great schedule or aim in place. Possibly many people’s idea of hell, but for us, something to be enjoyed, not so much because we were shopping but because sometimes it is really comforting just to hang out together doing something mundane and nattering about it. Most unusually we were on the search for some fast fashion. Not something I really approve of but its hard not to get caught up in the constant fiesta of fashion fun that stores like Primark, New Look and H and M create. I did also break my own rules of reuse, repurpose or recycle and bought myself a fabulous string shopping bag in bright orange.

Social Media plays a huge part in the celebration of Fathers Day. Through it I get a sense of community with those of us without fathers or grandfathers to celebrate in person for whatever reason. It certainly helps to be aware of the many others there are, who are feeling a twinge, or more, of sadness on such days. The enormous positive of Fathers Day on Social Media is that people actively introduce you to their fathers or father figures on line. So Facebook and Instagram feeds are full of truly wonderful role models, representing many generations of paternalistic love.

After 36 hours of delicious busyness we were back down to just the two of us and two dogs. The weather had taken a turn for the worse but our evening walk was enlivened by stone skimming and stone hunting something both humans and dogs take very seriously. All good prep for the week ahead.